the devil's trident

daaaaaaamn. my pitchfork is possessed o' tha devil. first i'm diggin over a huge garden bed and one of the tynes snaps off for no apparent reason and goes whizzing past my ear, then i'm diggin closer to the church and suddenly i get this water jet in the face as another tyne skewers the water pipe to the in-house plumbing that i thought was located underground on the otherside of the place. one rather hasty self taught plumbing adventure later.. i left it leaning up against the wall. i actually backed away from it.. waitin for the third thang.. like where the tyne snapped off is going to stabulate me when i go to push it into the ground with my foot. guh.. gotta go factorise cubic polynomials. WHO CURSED MY GARDEN IMPLEMENT?