quitline

oh for the fuckin love of god STOP SMOKING VICTORIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! if you need help just call me and i will tell you how.. first you need to stop being on fire.. just bell me for even more advice of that calibre.. i can get you a combustion patch or something..

GODAMMIT!!!

my mum's place looks as if it may go up in smoke so she's coming out here.. well atleast she said she was when she called me...

about five hours ago..

when i was at work in a neighbours garden and not there to take her call..

when i got home i called her house but she must've wound up watering everything down and left by then and i must say i'm a tad paranoid she may have been caught in fire on the road and burned to death!

but that bitch always pulls through..

she survived being crunched inside a minivan by a semitrailer carrying a fucking steam-roller.. she can survive a few mammoth orangey yellow balls of flame surely..

I HavE sUNstrOKe!!!!!

srsly.. i am sitting here with a wet face washer, tied at each corner, positioned on my head like one of those dudes in a movie about gettin lost in the desert.. my brain just won't stop being hot.. i puked before.. i mean fuck.. chronic bushfires.. forty degree gardening weather.. WHAT THE FUCK WERE OUR ANCESTOrs THINKING?!?!?!?!

guh.. i hear mice downstairs.. and i just discovered the cat has been using the gravel base of the loft plinth as a toilet..

lah lah laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah she'll be here any minute now to start annoying me for prolly the next week or two until the fires that were on three sides of her are out.. la la laaa lii la loo laa my brain is pinging on the inside of ma skull la la la.. hHAHAHAHHA!!!!!! i think a possum just fell of my roof!!!! i just heard godalmighty scraping and a thud.. eat shit you tomato pilfering bastard!! NATURE NATURE NATURE... it's at me again...

ow.

brain..

nite.