puppet whores

again with the mates dragging me down to the city for some fun on a sat'dee... after dinner in chinatown, we made our way to the show called "puppet burlesque".. prior to the real performance there was some extremely gay ventriloquism.. puppets voiced by bogan chicks SHOULD NOT RAP.. it's just homo. the performance was hosted by a hilarious old guy in a white tux, pretending to be shitfaced on cab sav, and constantly telling us all to get fucked.. marionettes were so-so and the purple hand puppet wearing the t-shirt that said "CUNT" was piss funny, as was the gigantic two man operated farmer character that arseholed the huge sheep on stage, but it was a group called "the snuff puppets" that almost resulted in mass urination.. as soon as they came on stage, i recognised them, as i had seen them as a teenager and even then, as a constantly halucinating art student, i thought to myself.. "those guys are fucking weird".. their first number was this lumpy assed elephant-man-faced female puppet on a four poster bed who began fingering her hairy mock vagina and pinching her skanky detachable nipples much to the humourous disgust of the audience... she then ripped her mirkin (pubic wig) off, pulled a long silk scarf out of her chest (meant to be the sea) followed by a model ship which sailed away as the red lights went down.. which was fair enough i guess.. their next act was a bunch of deformed cows and a brutish farmer guy who danced around with his herd performing tricks with them for a while, before stripping naked and slaying them all in a murderous frenzy with a large knife.. he then went around gutting them all, and their intestines danced out and they all began writhing all over each other while the farmer thrusted his pelvic region into them.. then they all rolled into the audience in an orgiastic seething mass, the front row copped it, one guy was humped by the crazy masturbating farmer, another was pulled to the ground and was dry rooted by some intestines***** five fucken stars.