school starts tomorrow so i'll be away from my home, cat, chooks and garden for 3 days a week for another year.. sigh. how hardcore am i? and how hardcore are you guys for putting me up for a night every few weeks??? i miss my home and my solitude like crazy when i'm away but it'll all be worth it when i know a shitload about stars.. and when i win the nobel prize for physics.. i'll mention you all in my acceptance speech..
The heatwave has passed.. i'm still sittin round in the buff but i'm not as sticky.. i actually had toast and a hot coffee this morning instead of eating cold creamed corn out of the can for fear that heating anything in any way would add to the insane temperature and ignite me..
and yessdee i got out there for a few hours as the gale force wind and searing crapness had subsided.. and gardened.. i got covered in chook poo and seasol and dirt.. HOORAY!
Amazingly tomatoes survived.. as did some of the zuchinnis and melons and the grape vines will live.. just. fruit trees are ok but it was touch and go there.. wind really fucks with a plant's moisture and couple that with 45 degrees and it's death city.. but more than i thought survived.. among the dead are my FOURTH lot of blueberry bushes so fuck them i give up. blueberries just don't like it here.. like passionfruit and okra.. my sunflowers all bit the dust, all peas and beans died, all broccoli, brussels sprouts.. most of the carrots, beets.. strawberries and rhubarb are still alive but most of their leaves were burnt off.. which looks really unattractive.. all this loss and still.. I MUST GARDEN.. i stand by my original statement.. gardening is like crack.. it costs alot.. it takes up a ridiculous amount of time and it never gives you back even money.. which is like every other addiction i've ever had so hey.. atleast this one is i dunno.. reputable or something.. and it means i always have something to talk about with old people at ballarat station.. i get approached lately.. like.. ALOT.. WTF? am i sending out friendly vibes? last shopping trip TWO DIFFFERENT WOMEN came up to me and said i know you don't work here but where do you think xxxxx is? please remember i spent nearly ten years as a drug addled goth.. sometimes with mohawks.. so the only people that used to regularly approach me were the cops.. then i spent five years after that bumbling grumpily throught the world of hardcore customer service so i walked around with a chip on my shoulder as i hated everyone.. getting treated like a worthless piece of shit every day will do that to you.. then i came out here..
maybe i'm finally mellowing out. i still panic when i have to walk down a crowded street, particularly with a people watching theme.. like degraves street.. but maybe that FUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKK OOOOOOOFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF aura has finally left me. oh i still fucking hate people generally.. we are all cunts and we must be eliminated.. but maybe i can deal with that now, knowing i can always come home to my isolated, quiet, temple and be unaffected for another half a week..
OR JUST SPEND 24 HRS A DAY ONLINE CHATTING TO EVERY FUCK UNDER THE SUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm back on lavalife and you should see some of the fuckin cranks i end up having conversations with just for the hell of it..
jesus christ.. you could use some of those ID pics to scare away children. no kidding sometimes i ask myself.. is this a dating website or the CIRCUSFREAK DATABASE????
no stalkers yet like last time and my god this post is long.. if you have made it this far you clearly are either a) procrastinating or b) having of NO life..
and RAY??? i only know one Ray.. He was the only person i was sorry to leave when i changed highschools in year 9.. he lived in Lilydale, was a total braniac nerd, had almost no chin, curly hair and was possibly the only person to receive as much shit from the other kids as me.. except he dealt with it much better.. i remember once in science some cunt filled a syringe with acid and squirted it on his pants and it burnt through.. (i think that was the same science class where some fuck dragged me around the classroom by my hair) but i can't remember his surname so the message you left signed Ray C could still be from some guy who wants money to get out of Nigeria, or wants to sell me dental insurance.. it's been 20 years dude but i'd still recognise you if you came up to me and said hi it's Ray.. i probably wouldn't notice you otherwise as i'll be looking away from people out the window, reading a textbook, or pretending to be asleep.. tad agoraphobic.. anyway.. i think i'll recognise your last name if you leave it in the comments.. or give me some kind of fact that i would know about our highschool or my mother or whatever.. if you can remember that far off.. oh and if you're another Ray that i have known, i clearly need reminding who you are.. cause i've searched my memory and highschool ray was the only ray i found so heeeeeeeeey i better end this post before it's 2010..
oh hang on!!! was your last name Cohen?! talk about hearkening back to the days of yore.